A little eavesdropping can really change your outlook on certain things you never really thought about heavily before. While hanging out in the office today waiting for my supervisor to come back, I caught a very touching conversation between the Duke counselor and a Tipster. The student was in the office because he suffers from asthma and was unable to participate in the evening study because his zoology class was going on a nature walk. So the student was in the office during that hour. While he was there, the counselor came in and just began to have a regular conversation with the student.
He began to slowly open up with her and talk about his experiences. I was amazed observing how the counselor phrased questions, listened for his responses, and then dug deeper to get more information from the child. She truly has a talent for counseling. Anyway, the child began to open up about his interests, experiences, and feelings. He shared how he is bullied in school and is often scared to speak up about it. His main worry about coming to the Duke TIP program was being bullied...thankfully he said that had not happened here. He spoke about being verbally and sexually bullied. He said that for a very long time he didn't say anything to his parents because he was frightened, and even after speaking up, the teachers monitored for about a week and that was the end of it. That's so sad.
He also mentioned that he was homesick but would give the TIP program a shot before giving up and going back home. The counselor had him share some things that he missed back at home like his pets and siblings. When asked what was keeping him in the program, he responded that he didn't have any friends back at home and here at Duke TIP, people actually converse with him! He shared that back at school, he has no chance! If you're not a "dumb athlete" you basically have no shot. The kid is very intelligently gifted which pretty much puts him in the worst place, socially--according to middle school kids.
It's great that for three weeks he can escape his miserable experiences at home and enjoy his time with other children that are similar to him and actually give him a chance. It was so heartbreaking because he said at school, the children don't even give him a chance to carry on a conversation.
My eyes began to water as I listened to this child open up about his experiences. I can't imagine ever feeling like that and to be 13 or 14 years old, it's so much to handle. I commend him for being brave and going to school and challenging himself, especially by coming to a program like TIP. He truly faced his major concern and is such a respectable gentleman. School is supposed to be a safe, fun, enriching environment and this child is getting harassed on a regular basis. It's so unfortunate that he is tortured because his has talents and is gifted. Although, I've known that bullying is a terrible thing to experience, hearing it from the voice of a child first-hand really opened my eyes and made me aware of the situation. I know that he is definitely not the only child being bullied and there are many, many students just like him scared to speak up about their experiences. I really appreciate our counselor for being there for him and allowing him to speak and share with her. She in turned listened to him and gave him a means of escape. He will never forget his summer at the Duke TIP program and I just pray for his safety and wellbeing when he returns back home.
For more information on bullying check this out!
:) <3 cds
I'm glad you got to experience this. I really respect the educators that I've been priveleged to work with. My good friend, Cat, is a social worker, and I've had this same feeling watching her work with students. But on the bullying note... it is real. It's a serious problem in some schools. School is supposed to be a safe space. School leaders really have to work hard to create a school community where students feel comfortable sharing their experiences. Schools and parents have to partner with each other to make sure that students have support and feel ok speaking to someone about their experiences. There needs to be zero tolerance for any type of harassment. Sigh. I'm glad this student was able to open up about his situation. Hopefully, it helped. Hopefully, she can somehow share this info with his parents, so that they can speak to school officials and have a better plan for when he returns to school.
ReplyDelete